Spring is officially here...

Well, spring has officially come to the Stafford household. After months of dealing with my pleadings to leave the pine wreath up on the porch door because I love it so much, Jay finally took it down...only make a wonderful discovery!




Yes that's right! We have baby birdies!!!!! So, obviously the wreath went right back up were it was and will stay there until the nest is no longer needed. Here's a pictures of the way they built the nest between the wreath and the door. We usually keep the blinds shut on the door, so that's probably why the were able to build there. Now they seem to be a little wigged out becaues we keep the blinds open a lot more, and we are constantly checking on them. Thankfully, we can do it from the other side of the glass and therefore we aren't getting out scent or anything on the little ones.



From our guesstimation, there are about three little beaks in there! I've never seen a birds nest with little ones in it so close up. It's amazing to see them wiggle around. They seem to be mostly asleep but if they get startled, they start to shiver and wiggle. (Sorry little ones, I totally forgot that I had the sound turned on on my phone when I took a picture of you!)

Our resident science expert, Shannon, who works at Discovery Place said that she thinks they are finches. I'm going to have to do some research into it to confirm and see what they eat so we can put plenty in the bird feeder for the mommie to bring them.

Jay has been laughing at me all weekend because I've been like a little girl with a new puppie. I'm always checking on them and oohing and gooing over them. I guess if I can't have a baby human right now, then having baby birdies to watch grow up will be enough.

The funny thing is I thought we had a bat sleeping on our back porch. We would go out there at night and more than once I felt something fly over my head as soon as I opened the door. I'd gotten rather freaked out a couple of times because I can deal with spiders, and I can deal with bugs, and in my first marriage I was the bug killer while my husband stood on things and shreeked liked a girl, but when it comes to snakes and bats, I'll run and hide with the best of 'em!

When Jay discovered the bird's next, he called me to come look and said, "I've found your flying thing!" It was at least nice to know I wasn't going crazy! And I much prefer a finch to a bat!

Don't worry, there will be plenty more pictures as they grow. And if any homeschool families (oir non-homeschool families at that) want to take a field trip to see them, just let me know!!!

Happy Monday everyone and bring on the spring!

Terriffic Tuesday

Hello y'all! This morning, I was emailed one of the coolest things I think I've ever seen! Anytime I get an email from Foot Petal, I know it's going to be good. They are always coming up with awesome products, half of which I own. But this morning I was totally floored! Look at these babies!!!!



How cute are those???? You know I'll be rocking that high heel sandle look! And now Jay won't be able to yell when I wear my flip flops all next winter. These have officially been added to my birthday wish list!

Check them out for yourself here!

Having a Budget Wedding Part 3 - The Guest List

source
Although far from the funnest and most creative part of the wedding planning, the guest list is really the first concrete thing that needs to be sketched out. I'm not going to lie to you though, this will be the thorn in your butt until the day of the wedding... then it will be the thank you cards, but that's another post. At this stage in the game, it doesn't have to be a complete list by any means, but a wedding with 30 guests and a wedding with 300 guests is going to be two completely different events!

If you are looking to stick to a strict budget, then smaller is always better. This goes for both the guest list and the wedding party. I don't mean hurt people's feelings, but keep in mind that smaller means more intimate which translates into you being able to talk to all your guests without feeling like the hostess of a NYC philanthropic gala. Additionally, a smaller guest list can be accomodated by a smaller facility, fewer tables and other rentals, less food, drinks, favors, etc. Sit down with your betrothed and start sketching out a list of those people who absolutely HAVE to be there and those you'd LIKE to have there. Additionally, get the same type of list from any parents involved as well. This will give you a great jump on things.

Sometimes having a small guest list is just not possible. It is possible to have a budget wedding with a large guest list, but it takes a little more creativity. If you can't go smaller with the guest list, then go smaller with other thing. For instance, have a dessert or brunch reception instead of a dinner reception. The wedding industry considers this to be perfectly acceptable as long as you plan it for an appropriate time and give everyone a heads up on the invitations. So, don't plan a dessert reception for 5pm when most people are going to be hungry from lunch, but not yet had dinner. Instead, plan it for 8pm and make a note on the invitation that there will be a dessert reception following the ceremony (or something to that effect). That way people can grab their own dinner before they get to the wedding and aren't surprised when they get there. None of these specific decisions have to be made right now, but just be mindful that with a budget wedding, something has to be smaller, either the guest list or the party.

When determining who to send out invites to, think about a few things: First of all, "do I anticipate this person to be in my life at my 25 year anniversary?" If the answer is no, then consider dropping them from the invite list. When it comes to co-workers the generally accepted rules says that if you hang out with them outside of work, then invite them. If you don't hang out with them outside of work, then don't feel obligated to invite them. Obviously, don't hand out invitations at work if you aren't inviting everyone though!

The MOMENT you start collecting names, figure out how you want to organize your guest list, whether it's in a computerized addressbook, an excel spreadsheet, or using theknot.com's guestlist organizer. Keeping this list organized so you know what info you have, and what info you need, will be one of your biggest frustrations. The more organized you can be at the beginning, the better it will be for you!

Next up: The Facility!

Having a Budget Wedding Part 2 - Priorities

All images curtesy of theknot.com.


Actually, I lied at the end of the last budget wedding post. There's one more thing before we get to the guest list.

So, now that you are beginning to see what your dream wedding would look like, it's time to come back down to reality. You have a budget. You want to stick to your budget. And trust me, on your first anniversary, you will be much more thankful for refusing to go into massive debt for the wedding, then you will be dissapointed that you didn't have a stretch hummer limo! But how do you make your dreams come true without sacrificing your budget and vis versa?!?!?! That is were the priorities come in!

With weddings, just like in life, priorities are key! If you don't know where your priorities are, then you may spend $1000 on the first beautiful dress that you see, and find out later that having nice, catered food is more important to you than the dress! Opps! Trust me, figuring out your priorities will save you big time, and make sure that your money goes to what is most important to you.

There are a few ways to do this. One is to list all the differnt elements you consider to be associated with the wedding, (i.e. flowers, food, alcohol, dress, tux, wedding cake, etc) and then you and your fiance rank them in order of importance. Another way is for you and your fiance to both make a "Top 3" list. This list would (rather obviously) be your top 3 priorities. For instance, having a a bag piper may be one of yours, and your fiance may be insistant on getting married outside.

This expercise is going to set the tone for everything to come, and make decisions much easier. For instance, if having catered high end asian food to celebrate one person's heritage is important to one participate, then it may be a requirement to keep the guest list to a minimum. If you have a large circle of friends and a large extended family, and having all of them at the wedding is important to you, then you may need to think about alternative types of receptions such as a brunch or dessert reception.

One of the important things when planning a wedding is that both people participate as much as possible. Usually one person takes the lead in planning, which is fine. But make sure that the other person's thoughts are heard as well. Just because one person may be a guy doesn't mean they don't know anything about flowers, and just because one person is a girl doesn't mean that she has dreamed of this since she was five. Planning a wedding is the first big thing that many couples do as a team. So, start your marriage off well with lots of communication, respect, and understanding.

Next up: The Guest List

I couldn't say it better myself!

This video is so good, I can't even think of anything to add! Just watch!

Having a Budget Wedding Part 1 - The Vision

Is it even possible to have a wedding on a budget these days? Sometimes it feels like a daunting task! According to the Bridal Association of America, the estimated average cost of a wedding in 2009 is going to be over $30K! Whether you are the parent of a bride or groom or a couple paying for the shindig yourself, that can be a daunting number, in this economy or any other!

So, do limited finances mean a bride and groom have to pout, morning the loss of their dream wedding? Well it depends on what your idea of a wedding is. If you are insistant on a white stretch hummer limo and a five course plated dinner, then you might be disappointed. But if you understand that a wedding is a celebration of the bride and groom and the love that they will share for the rest of their lives, and a time for their community to come together and celebrate with them, then it really helps you put things in perspective.

Ok, so you've just gotten engaged... congratulations! Now what?????? For most people the task seems nothing short of overwhelming. Even if you've had a subscription to Brides or Martha Stewart Wedding since you were five, pulling together the biggest party you will ever throw while trying to keep in mind that it's supposed to be about more than just a party can make you want to rethink your fiance's suggestion of being married by an Elvis impersonator in Vegas!

But don't worry, there are some things that you can do at the beginning and through the process that will really help you along the way!

First though, a tip: DO NOT buy anything until you have a clear idea of what you want the tone, style, and theme of the wedding to be! You will most likely only be wasting your money on random things that you won't be able to use in the end!

1) Make yourself a cup of tea, grab a blanket, sit back in a cumfy chair, close your eyes, and envision what you want your event to look and feel like. What words come to mind when you think of the wedding? casual, modern, elegant, rustic, glamorous? On a scale of 1 to 10, how formal do you want it to be? Does a theme come to mind? And when I say "theme" I don't mean cowboys and indians or luau! But have you always loved the look of an elegant monogram, what about a cool line drawing of a cool sea shell for a beach wedding. Before settling on anything though, seriously consider putting together what is called an inspiration board. This is basically a collage of different things that, when you look at it, gives you the same feeling that you want your wedding to have.







*click to see sources*

And while we're on sources, you might as well just go ahead and bookmark Snippet & Ink and Style Me Pretty's websites because trust me, you will want to check them out every day if not every few days! In addition, when putting together you board, try to keep track of where your images came from (wish I'd known this when I was putting mine together). It's just good web ettiquet that if you are going to borrow an image that you acknowledge were you got it from so that if another bride likes it she can go to the original source.

Don't feel like you can only make one inspiration board. I've known girls who made one for every element of their wedding, who made one at each major development, and anything else. The first one or two you make might not follow a certain color scheme. Just pull pictures that give you the feel without worrying about it all matching color wise. I suspect though that a color scheme will emerge as you look over your board(s).

Next up: Guess Whose Coming to Dinner... the guest list.

Sorry for the delay...

Sorry for the delay in posts everyone. I was planning on taking a little break after the blitzcrig of wedding wrap up post last week, but didn't plan on it being this long! I'm working on a herculean wedding tips and tricks blog, which I'm thinking may need to be turned into a bunch of smaller blogs because it's seriously turning into a book, either that or I need to actually write my own wedding how-to book ('cause there certainly aren't enough of those at Barnes and Noble!).



On top of the slight burn out, I missed a dose of my happy medication last week which turns normally tired but mostly upbeat, positive, go-getting Bonnie into why-do-the-dumbest-people-in-a-50-mile-radius-somehow-flock-to-me-bonnie. My annoyance fuse gets really short, my bull shit tollerance falls dangerously low, and I lose the majority of my compassion and empathy for my fellow human beings. Let's just say, it's not a good scene!



Thankfully, I got caught back up and that passed, just in time to come down with strep throat. Which is a funny story. I figure I got it from one of the kids Alexander Youth Network, or from Shannon who works with kids all day and might have just been carrying it, but the only person I know to have had it is one of my good friends, April... who I haven't seen in 3 weeks! I keep teasing her and telling her that I think she gave it to me over facebook! ;-) The only additional thing I can say about this is that antibiotics are a wonderful thing when used appropriately!



All that to say that there are more blogs coming soon! Tomorrow is the NC Equality Day of Action in Raleigh. I'll be heading up V.E.R.Y early tomorrow morning in time to be there by 9am. They will give us a crash course on how to lobby from 9:30 to 10:30 and then send us over to the capital building for our appointments with our senator and representatives. Once we are done there, we come back for lunch and debriefing and strategy sessions. I am truthfully so excited I can hardly stand it! I've got to put together my note cards with my talking points on them and make a few personal calling cards to leave with those I meet with.

I've been doing research on grassroots lobbying, and have been learning lots of fun stuff, like... always dress professionally, always have something to leave behind that has your best points on it, and leave a business or personal calling card so they have your name. Also, I need to make sure that I write thank you notes when I get back on Wednesday. Although I've written my representatives before, I have never visited them in Raleigh or really knew that was possible. I got a twitter message this morning saying that they had over 230 people pre-registered to be at the event tomorrow and how that's double what they have ever had before. I'm so glad that I took the time off of work to really stand up for what I believe in.

The ex-pastor of a church my family use to attend (yeah, one of those who ran off with the church's money and the secretary) use to always say, "You do what you want to do." Sounds simplistic but it's true. The bottom line is, we make time for the things we really want to do. As much as I bitch and complain about how much my weight and being so out of shape bothers me, obviously it doesn't bother me that much because I don't take time to do anything about it. People can talk all they want about what they are in to and what they believe in, but in my opinion the lipmus test is when you look at how they spend their time. That's why I really started getting inolved in the LGBTQ fight in the last 6 months or so. I realized that I talked alot about fighting for equal rights, but my life showed nothing to that end. Well, now it does!

Well, anyway, expect some new post in the next few days! Hopefully, I'll be back to feeling 100% here soon! Hope everyone had a great weekend!